Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Episode 82: Polar Eclipse (Bare Me the Details)


Last time, on DCA…
The protagonists were convinced that the show has to end.
The Beta Avengers were revealed to be the main antagonists.
The main protagonists are ready to take them on.

DARK CHAO ADVENTURES
Season Eight: The Last Journey
Episode Eighty-Two: Six Degrees of Progressive Darkness, DEGREE THREE: Polar Eclipse (Bare Me the Details)
[the story resumes in the Dark Garden]
[all the protagonists are there, you read the last episode, you know]
Chapter 1: Let the Party Begin
[shadows begin coming out of the walls, forming humanoid shadows walking around]
Shadow: I feel like this is DJay's idea of a pun.
[….HA, I didn't notice that!]
[Future Shadow sighs and snaps his fingers]
[the shadows disappear]
White: ..wow, where were you when we needed you?
ShadowF: In the background. I've been helping you for a while; we've all been helping in our own ways. But you need to develop your characters in your own ways.
Red: How the hell does any of this make sense from a linear perspective?
[Shade chuckles]
Shade: It makes perfect sense, Red. We're a meta show-- a metaphor, to be more specific. Now c'mon. We have a lot of work to do.
[they head out and, in various uneventful groups, split up and check out the various gardens and CPAK]
[CUE LATER, when they regroup in the Chao Lobby!]
Chao: We were looking for Echo, correct?
ShadowF: That would be correct. Find anything?
Chao: Well, I checked the Hero Garden, and I found Tail. He was pleased to hear we were going to finally end the show, and he even claimed to know where we could find Echo.
ShadowF: Yes, and?
Chao: He said the TV room's the best bet.
[the camera zooms out to reveal the show so far is being watched on blue screens in a room lit by no other source other than the screens]
[four shadowy figures stand in this room, watching over screens showing the show and whatnot]
[the first shadowy figure, the reader assumes to be the MILKMAN, alter ego of Shawn the Dark, Shade's father]
[the MILKMAN, as you know, is a robot suit that… well, it's basically a traditionally-bad Sonic fancharacter!]
MILK: No longer, narrator. Let me.. clear some space.

[the MILKMAN appears in a white void, almost as if it's to counter the Veteran's Committee's black void]
[this void is made up of IT, the substance that crafts and creates every story I have ever written]
MILK: This is going to be the final adventure, correct?
[Correct.]
MILK: Then I demand a more respectful appearance.
[I'm grinning right now. Go for it.]
MILK: First of all, let's establish my color scheme. Red, correct?
[Correct. A dark red. Green eyes. You are the evil Donnie.]
MILK: What?
[Nothing, haha. Never you mind.]
MILK: Alright. Do you have any suggestions for my appearance, Writing Writer?
[I'm thinking about what would best fit you, the ambivalent figurehead for essentially a team of script terrorists. But I find it hard not to correlate your name with the horrible fancharacter I invented.]
MILK: …how about we take it from the top? Redesign the rest of us first, and then come to me last?
[That's a swell idea.]
[Tagliare fades in]
Tag: *looks around* Operation: REDESIGN was a success?
MILK: Absolutely. What would you like to look like, Tagliare?
Tag: Well, considering my former appearance was literally just Sonic the Hedgehog with taller ears and red eyes, anything would do. But if I had to choose, I'd say make me some kind of chao.
[Really?]
Tag: Yeah, actually. I mean, MILKMAN's got Shawn, JOE's got Cham, Echo's.. well, Echo. I'm just a Sonic with taller ears! I say you make me a blue Rebel chao.
[Then so be it. Tagliare, the fourth member of the Beta Avengers, is a blue Rebel chao wearing a gas mask, fedora, and trench coat]
Tag: ..wow, that's much more specific than I requested!
[Don't question it. You are now the Tagliarchway. ..but just stick with Tagliare, I'm just making puns.]
Tag: Okay, well. I kinda like this. I'm fine with this.
[Tagliare fades out]
[Echo fades in]
[Echo, I think everyone is satisfied with your appearance. You are just a purple Dark/Fly chao with many.. eagle parts or something.]
Echo: I fully agree!
[Echo fades out]
[JOE fades in]
[Now, JOE. Your appearance.. did you even have one?]
JOE: Outside Cham and that Therjak crockery, I believe you said I had a "Dark Matter suit."
[We'll flesh that out. You are the real brains behind the matter, though the MILKMAN is going to be much more threatening this time around. I.. hm, this is truly the difficult part.]
JOE: Look at it this way. Tagliare's color scheme was blue, Echo's was purple. MILKMAN's is dark red, so mine should be related to that.
[Well, purple is the combination of red and blue, so what.. if you were, like.. the opposite of purple?]
JOE: ….yellow?
[JOE is now Cham inside a wooden suit painted to look like a jester, with a yellow color scheme]
JOE: What.
[Just trust me on this one.]
JOE: If you say so.
[JOE fades out]
MILK: So we have a war-torn soldier, a bird/chao hybrid, a wooden jester, and.. myself.
[You, MILKMAN, I think I actually have a good idea in mind for you.]
MILK: Very well. State it!
[Your appearance is never definite. No figure can take a look at you and fully comprehend what he or she is looking at. This actually matches with your description in Episode Thirty-Two, as well as…..]
MILK: As well as..?
[..well. Your parallel, you could say. My point is, the only thing people would be able to decipher would be a dark-red color and possible green eyes.]
MILK: I like this.
[Very well. Such is your appearance now.]
[the MILKMAN fades out]
Chapter 2: Formidability
[cut to the TV room]
[the newly-designed Beta Avengers are about to watch the protagonists walk in through the door behind them]
[but this time, they're ready.]
[the protagonists walk in]
[Future Shadow snaps his fingers just as all four Beta Avengers bend the script]
[every television switches off]
[Shade and Shadow bend the script in an attempt to short-circuit the MILKMAN and JOE's robot suits]
[the MILKMAN and JOE laugh loudly, as they no longer have any sort of circuitry on them]
[the protagonists pass suspicious glances with each other]
[the two forces decide to hold their script-bending for now]
[Shade steps forward, every move is watched by all]
Shade: Beta Avengers. We want to end the show.
Echo: We know.
Shade: We have already given in to one antagonistic force's demands.
Tag: We saw.
Shade: We are fully willing to negotiate.
JOE: State your terms, and we'll state ours, then.
Shade: I'd like you to state yours first, as ours kinda depend on knowing what yours are.
[JOE turns to look at the MILKMAN with a smirk, though it's not visible through the wooden costume]
[the MILKMAN steps forward to meet Shade's eyes]
[Shade tries to figure out what he's looking at but fails]
MILK: To answer your question, I pose a question to you. With the betas of the second season fully avenged, what more do YOU think we want?
ShadowF: Don't answer that, Shade. It's the "Invent a Reason For Us" fallacy. Clearly, these felons are just in it for the anarchy.
[the MILKMAN laughs]
MILK: "Anarchy!" As if we were that barbaric. Fine, if your colleague over there doesn't share our love for riddles, I'll spell it out for you.
[the screens turn on, this time giving an indigo light to the room]
MILK: We exist as the antagonists. We don't want some simple cause such as to avenge a lost idea or to spread chaos. We're in this because we have no other choice.
Tagliare has been dead for years. He was brought back to life by your careless bending of the script, and he has no purpose for living. He turned to unexpected developments to take the pain away.
Echo, cast out of your civilization by time and society's progression, wandered the subplots for a while before falling right into the grip of unexpected developments. He spent a while setting up our arrival.
JOE had several different identities throughout the story, all evil. It's all he knows to do anymore.
Myself, I was simply forgotten, put on a backburner. You tried to forget me, you tried to grow up and treat me like I was the embodiment of your childish writing. But yet The Beast was made with my leftovers.
I still had life in me. WE still had life in US. We demand to be put to good use. We are formidable foes, and we are rich in character.
Remember us, dammit. Remember what we represent. Or else we'll make sure you are ALL forgotten with us. You will see the horror of a hiatus.
[the MILKMAN takes a bow]
MILK: Thank you for the crude assumption, "Future Shadow."
ShadowF: Fine. ..fine. So I was wrong.
MILK: We. Want. Revenge. We no longer want to avenge the betas, but now we want to have one last big fucking bang.
Echo: We won't rest until we have received satisfactory closure.
[Dark, impatient, throws Final Fantasy 7]
Shadow: DARK, NO!
[both the MILKMAN and Future Shadow bend the script]
Chapter 3: The Darkness at the Edge of the Metaphysical Universe
[cut to a bright white light]
[the protagonists spawn]
Shade: Dark. Dark, what the hell, man?
Dark: I couldn't take it anymore. I'm sorry. They're just.. insufferable. They keep going on about needing "closure;" WE SPENT SEVERAL SEASONS DEDICATED TO THEM.
Red: But Dark. They didn't get the necessary closure. Episode 50 was a bit of a let-down compared to the several seasons of build-up.
Shade: Yeah, I mean, it was riddled with jokes ripped from Family Guy, plot holes, wibbly-wobbly time travel, and a court scene out of nowhere. Not to mention the whole "RESET" thing.
Chao: That, and it was focused on Shade. There's more characters to the show than just him, you know!
[Shade looks at Chao and sighs]
Shade: Fuck you, man. You're completely right, but still.
Chao: What? What did I do now? I'm getting sick of you treating me like some bullshit evil character.
Shade: You're not evil, Chao. You're just extremely annoying. If anyone here's insufferable, it's this dweeb over here.
[Chao grabs Shade by the throat]
Chao: What the fuck did I ever do to you? Nothing. Fucking nothing. Well, I'm a Dark Chaos Chao now. I can finally stop your bullying.
[the other chao hold him off]
Red: Chao, calm your shit! Shade is NOT the one you want to fight. Besides, you've done plenty. You've taken control of our garden multiple times and ran it into the ground, you got us all into trouble with several foes…
Shade: You set all the Freelancers against me that one time.
Chao: That was Mephiles' idea!
Red: Still. The fact that you're so susceptible to his influence is telling.
Amfy: Hey, about the Freelancers…
[everyone turns to look at Amphis]
Amfy: Where are they now?
[the chao look at each other]
Dark: Didn't they all leave? At some point or other?
Shade: I think Shadow Bonic and Flame stuck around, as did Solar. But I haven't been keeping in contact.
Red: Chaosky and Zagu are with the female Shade. Professor Shade, if you will.
Shade: What others were there? There were Honey and Buddy, and that Night guy. Arrow. Who was Multichao's? ..Phantom, right. He could do some cool stuff.
Dark: And Quartz.
Shade: Yeah, and Quartz, he was BlackPhoenix's.
Red: Dark-Hawk, we haven't forgotten him. Dunno where he is either.
Shade: Man. What happened to our fanbase?
Shadow: From what I understand, DJay hasn't had a proper reader in a matter of years, but he's trying to advertise the show to his Fearblogger colleagues.
Red: Not even I get that meta, Shadow.
Shadow: DCA isn't a timeless narrative, guys. It has a definite timeline to it, always has. We're allowed to get that meta.
White: Alright. So what's this Fearblogger thing mean, then?
Shadow: Deej is a writer for the Fear Mythos. And from the looks of it, the Beta Avengers have been revamped to represent common motifs present in the mythos. At least, in his canon of it.
ShadowF: The bottom line is don't worry about it. DJay's just starting to let his writings blend. Intentionally, I'm rather sure.
Red: Hrm. Linking several different canons by set arc phrases, numbers, and motifs. That's an intriguing concept.
Dark: Guys, can we get back to the topic at hand? The Beta Avengers. What are we gonna do about them?
Shadow: We're gonna defeat them, Dark.
Chapter 4: Formulation
[cut to a disturbingly quaint corner of the sickening reaches of space]
[the MILKMAN, JOE, Echo, and Tagliare spawn]
Echo: Ugh! That fucking little Dark punk, I want to just.. kick him in the shins!
MILK: In due time, Echo. I fear the end time has finally been set in motion. The TV room has been destroyed. We no longer watch the protagonists.
JOE: End time, Milky? You really believe in that stuff? …I'm sorry; I don't know why I said that. Of course the end time is coming.
[the MILKMAN bends the stars nearby to make a constellation of a trilby]
MILK: It's an age-old mystery, readers. Throughout the seventh season, there have been mentions of a trilby hat and, much more obviously, "the end of DCA." We've all been wondering how it's going to go around.
Tag: What's the trilby hat got to do with anything?
[the MILKMAN snaps his fingers and a huge stack of papers spawns]
[the top is a title page: "OH GOD THE RAPTURE IS BURNING"]
MILK: DCA has a spiritual successor. This is it. It's unfinished, but it is entirely about the coming of the end of the world.
Echo: That thing's about humans and eldritch abominations, though.
MILK: Consider the humans the chao, and the eldritch would be the collective antagonists throughout this show. Skim through it. You'll pick up on what I'm getting at.
[the Beta Avengers skim through the narrative presented to them]
JOE: Eight and five. Huge focus on prog motifs. Antagonists who try to benefit the protagonists. Hell, our appearances are ripped out of here, save for Echo's, of course.
Tag: The narrative even outright mentions DCA from time to time, and I'm pretty sure the comedy and horror blend is expanded from this.
MILK: Exactly. So it's not farfetched to suggest that Shadow's newest costume might be a symbol of the coming end.
Echo: No, I'd go as far as to agree with you on that matter.
Tag: So what are you suggesting? Should we.. pull tricks from this Rapture story?
MILK: No. We should simply keep it in mind. With the end of a tale as long as ours, DJay's letting his motifs intersect. Take it how you will, but take it into consideration, nontheless.
JOE: Hm.
[the antagonists ponder for an undetermined amount of time]
Echo: I have a suggestion. First, let the camera cut away for the sake of suspense.
[cut to the protagonists in the bright white light]
Chao: I want to get something straight.
Red: Ask away.
Chao: Why haven't we just.. killed them?
Shade: That's.. difficult to explain. For one thing, they're extremely formidable figures. For another thing, we're certain they have much planned.
Red: And ultimately, whatever happens in this story is up to the Writing Writer. But DJay doesn't want to help until all the pieces are set.
Chao: And what does that mean?
ShadeF: It means we haven't reached the right episode yet. We're only on Episode 82, and we still have elements to introduce for the final battle.
Chao: How do you know 82 isn't the last episode?
Shadow: It's a matter of arc numbers, Chao.
Chao: I thought DCA's arc number was 32.
Shade: DCA doesn't really have an arc number, although that's probably a good guess if it had one. Eight and five, see, recur in DJay's works a lot these days. We think they only refer to the end.
Shadow: I think 8 and 5 are IT.
Red: You think, when a story begins to end, the numbers eight and five begin to creep in? And that when it ends, the eight and the five are all that's left?
Shadow: Pretty much. The eight and the five are there to link DJay's stories together. They are the numerical representation of cycles and music.
Chao: So. So are you saying Episode 85 will be the last episode because of the numbers, alone?
Shadow: I'd wager a guess that DJay actually wasn't intending that, but he realized the numbers were there.
Chao: And. For all the non-musical types, can you tell us why 8 and 5 represent cycles?
Dark: Allow me.
Chapter 5: Octave
Dark: You know a musical octave, right? The C major scale, for instance, is comprised of C, D, E, F, G, A, and B? The note names loop from G back to A, and after B comes the same note as the start of the scale but.. an octave higher.
Chao: In this case, being C. Yeah, I get that.
Dark: Count the number of notes there. Go on.
Chao: C, D, E, F, G, A, B… that's seven.
Dark: So what's the eighth?
Chao: The.. same note as the start. I see. And where does the five come in? Is that, like, the flats and stuff?
Dark: Chromatics, yeah. In western music, there exist five flats and five sharps, and.. well, a flat and a sharp are essentially the same thing. ..essentially. For the sake of convenience.
Chao: So there are eight notes for a full cycle of notes, and the five are just there for accompaniment?
Dark: It gets ridiculously complicated, but yes. Let's put it that way.
Shade: Okay, now that we've explained some of the basic concepts, what's next?
Shadow: The next episode.
TO BE CONTINUED!

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